Pasta Train Salad

I wondered if I would ever fit in, but after awhile it seemed that the people sitting around the table saw something familiar in me that I had overlooked in the mirror. At first the stares were just a little too long, the heads tilted to the side a little too far, and I had the uneasy awareness that I was being closely scrutinized. Was I imagining things?

The topic jumped from one thing to the next, with pauses like train cars that I hesitated too long to catch. I was intimidated. I couldn't catch my groove. My thoughts were panting, running full speed, striding to keep pace, but the desire to collapse was looming like a dark cloud in a Parisian winter.

My mind wandered to this place. I thought about walking along the cobblestone streets by the river under a cold dark sky. The river climbed toward the city streets, and then, there it was again. The train. The smooth red sides and shiny gold wheels charged steadily along. I stopped and watched as it rippled gently in the wake of a passing river boat. I raised my head to catch it in the glass windows of the boat, and noticed that the train was now still. I turned to search for the engine, which, according to its reflection was positioned directly behind me. When I turned my head I saw that nothing was there.

Pasta Train Salad
Cook 3 cups rice pasta
Heat another pot of water and blanch:
1 small head cauliflower,
2 large carrots, diced
1 large zucchini, diced
when the pasta is done cooking, drain the water and rinse with cold water. Do the same with the vegetables. Mix together and add
4 Tbsp olive oil
1 tsp lemon pepper
2 Tbsp cider vinegar
1 tsp brown sugar
1/2 tsp ume plum vinegar
1 Tbsp tarragon
1 clove fresh minced garlic
1/2 red onion, diced
1/4 cup chopped fresh basil

Christina's vote: "This salad made me go toot toot!"

Lion's World Salad

A small yellow glow radiated from the square, red glass on the table. The flame in the center swayed it's hips from side to side, creating shadows that stretched long and lean on the papered walls and then crouched back inward. The shadowy creatures were tethered to the world inside the golden dome. I was careful not to stray too far from the light, fearful that the protective globe surrounding us would shatter and the cold, dark night would seep in.

Before the dusk had fallen on that day, I had made the decision to toss aside the meaning of time and cleared my schedule for an endless night. The waiter came and I watched as you played a friendly game of catch with his smile.

You hardly glanced at your menu. I studied mine as though it were a movie listing, and imagined each cast of flavors before deciding what kind of experience I wanted to enjoy. The waiter brought you a plate of shrimp smothered in a red sauce and you shrieked when you noticed the heads were still attached. Tears welled up. Our eyes were pushed shut by enormous grins as we roared with laughter. As we laughed, the whole expansive room disappeared. The golden light took over, and in that moment I felt completely safe.

Lion's World Salad
8-10 small red potatoes, diced with the skin on
1 head broccoli, picked into bite sized pieces
3 cloves spicy garlic
salt
1/2 cup diced mustard greens
1/2 red onion, diced
4 Tbsp olive oil
1 Tbsp apple cider vinegar
pepper
1/2 tsp ume plum vinegar

Cook potatoes in boiling water for about 25 min. Remove from heat, drain and cool.
Heat about 2 Tbsp water and add broccoli and a pinch of salt. Allow broccoli to steam until bright green (about 4 min). Drain any extra water and add 2 Tbsp olive oil and garlic. Heat broccoli for an additional 2 min. Remove from heat and cool. Pour over potatoes. Add remaining oil, vinegars, mustard greens, onions and black pepper.

Christina's vote: "This salad was bold"

It's about time for more salad

"Hello, I'd like to speak with Annie please."
"Yeah. Hang on a moment. ANNIEEEE" The woman's voice was blase with a hint of crabby. It was not at all what I would expect from the mother of a responsible high school girl scout, especially one who was mature enough to organize a health and nutrition day for her troop. I peered around the pristine church basement. The face of my cell phone was glued to my ear, causing my cheek to burn and my ear to sweat.
"Hello?" said the young voice.
"Hi Annie, I am here. Where is the group?" The heavy grocery bag pulled at my left shoulder and cut into my hand. I set it on the ground, balancing it against my leg to prevent the long green carrot tops that were bursting out of the top from tipping the whole bag over. I could hear the low drone of the pastors voice whispering through the cracks of the room where a Sunday service was taking place. The thought dawned on me that it was a little strange for a group of girl scouts would be meeting in a church on a Sunday for a workshop, but having never been a girl scout, I wouldn't know how these things work.
"Um, actually it was yesterday." She said.
"What!!!??! But your email said the 20th. That's today! I am here today!"
"Yeeeah, we didn't know where you were. Sorry. I didn't email you last night. I meant to."
I had driven through traffic. I had been to three grocery stores. I had been planning for days, researching the origins of different foods. I was going to do a mindfulness exercise with them. We were going to taste-test organic and conventional apples, ethylene vs high tunnel tomatoes, whole carrots vs baby carrots, and foods with hidden salt. I walked out of the church and into my car with the mixed bag of desirable and undesirable goods and emotions.

There is something about a cow pasture that makes me forget that cars are for getting from one place to another. The sky was gathering puffs of cloud, and knitting them into one large white blanket. The streets were flawed with evenly spaced bumps that gave my wheels a rhythmic industrial clank, like the sound of pistons pumping. I thought about machinery, and imagined the robotic arms picking unripe tomatoes on an industrial farm, sending them down a conveyor belt to be gas ripened with ethylene. I imagined the crates being loaded into a truck, tossed and stacked like mail. I took out one of the bright pink tomatoes and brought it up to my nose. Nothing. It felt greasy in my hands. This is the tomato we have come to know. I took out the other tomato from the farmers market, grown in a high tunnel. It felt soft in my hand. It never would have survived a robotic arm, or being packed, stacked, and thrown around in a crate. It was hand picked, and delivered to me at the farmers market. I know because I met the man who picked it.

A large clang jolted me as my wheel skipped over a hole in the road, and I came into the realization that I was driving aimlessly. The heat was steaming the fragrances out of the strawberries sitting in the passenger seat. I felt bad about missing the girl scouts, but recognized how good it felt to have the intention of going. I pulled over to the side of the road and got out my phone, opened up the text window, and sent a message to Christina.
"I think it's time for another round of 90 salads" I wrote.
Her message came back instantly.
"finally"

Strawberry rosemary balsamic vinaigrette
1 1/2 cups small sweet strawberries
1 1/2 Tbsp balsamic vinegar
1 tsp honey
1 tsp mustard powder
pinch salt
tsp pepper
2 Tbsp grape seed oil
1/2 tsp chopped fresh rosemary
2 tsp white wine vinegar
Blend together the strawberries and balsamic, and transfer into a small saucepan. Heat for 4 min over med/high heat. Remove from heat and add remaining ingredients.

Salad
mixed baby greens with 1 cup arugula and 1/2 cup cilantro
1 cup sugar snap peas or snow peas
1 cup diced purple cabbage
1 cup strawberries for garnish
1 cup dry roasted almonds
Garnish with goat brie if desired

Christina's vote: "Don't see how it could get better than this, but I am sure it will."

Crunchy Bitter American Stink Salad

despite the word stink (which inserted itself into the otherwise crisp title by the nasty little blue cheese crumbles that make for memorable dining), this salad is really yummy and not actually stinky.
Salad dressings usually are comprised of an acid, a fat, an emulsifier (to keep the liquid and the fat together) and some herbs or seasonings. Examples of acids are lemon juice, orange juice and vinegar. Examples of fats used are olive oil, vegetable oil, sesame oil, tahini. Examples of foods that contain emulsifiers are egg yolk, lemon juice and honey. I will usually provide loose suggestions of ingredients for each dressing, then you get to play chemist and create the perfect dressing to suit your palate. As the days go on we will be making all our own dressings, and we are not going to shy away from the homemade ceasar or ranch either.. but these will come later.

For today, a simple dressing (if you feel lazy, omit this step and use ranch, or french, or ranch and french, or whatever you need to use up in your fridge because as the days go on we will be making all of our own dressings).

Squeeze a lemon into your salad bowl. Rub the juice all over the sides of the bowl (like when you rub lime juice on the rim of your glass). Mince and add a small clove of garlic (if you have a date with a Virgo, omit this step) drizzle in some olive oil ~1-2 tbsp just keep tasting as you go. If you ever feel there is not enough flavor (too much oil) just add some vinegar. Too much vinegar? Add some honey! too much honey? add some cayenne pepper..too much cayenne? ah, too bad. add salt and pepper if you like. Okay, dressing is done..now, the salad. mix together:

chopped green lettuce
diced green pepper
diced celery
diced purple cabbage
thinly sliced shallots (unless you have a date..but of course if they REALLY like you they won't mind..)
blue cheese crumbles
(if you are doing this as a dinner salad, add sliced hard boiled egg)

If you want to make this salad FOR a date and you want to impress and amuse them, top with dried hibiscus flower (they are like giant craisins but yummier and prettier)

Incidentally, while you are using up your pre-made salad dressings, try mixing french and ranch dressing and using it as a dip for fresh raw green beans. It reminds me of eating french fries but without the greasy after-bloat.